I heard something a couple of days ago that sort of put me over the edge. See, it was the same thing I’d been hearing from different random people for over a month, and quite frankly, I’m tired of it.
I hadn’t planned to post on the topic which I’m about to post on because it seemed to deeply personal, too hard to talk about, and yet when I heard this statement once again, I decided that perhaps there was some more that God wanted to do with this experience to help other people understand the nature of God better.
There’s an overarching belief in America that “Everything happens for a reason.” Christians as a whole haven’t stopped to question this, but rather adapted it to “God has his reasons” for whatever bad thing just happened.
For me, it was a miscarriage at the end of May.
And the statement I heard over and over again was that “God has his reasons” or “God made our bodies to process things like this” as I began to heal.
And I am thankful that my body could process it without medical intervention, but my body wasn’t made to work like that. It’s just an example of God’s grace in a messed up situation. There was no divine “reason” for this miscarriage. Something went wrong, somethings we’ll never know because it wasn’t even quite 5 weeks into the pregnancy, but something went wrong because the world is broken. And bad shit happens because the world is broken.
The world is broken because we broke it, way back at the beginning of time, when the world was a lot younger and the first humans chose not to trust what God had to say.
So now we process pain in a broken world and we somehow have to ascribe the source of that pain to “God having his reasons.” If that were true, then everything good and bad would have to have its source in God and his mysterious ways, but the problem with that is God would no longer be good.
But, some would argue, perhaps God needs to teach us things we don’t understand, or perhaps he’s punishing us for some wrongdoing that we don’t know about.
It’s true that God uses parent imagery of himself in Scripture, but most of the things that people try to apply that metaphor to in their lives would sort of be the equivalent of burning your baby’s finger on the stove because they reached for the hot burner so that they would learn not to touch the stove, rather than telling them “no” or some other much less harsh form of discipline that while they might not like it, causes no lasting damage.
We attribute to God’s reasons and God’s discipline things that are either direct results of living in a broken world, or consequences of our own behavior. Your baby might end up with a permanent scar for touching the stove after you made it clear that touching hot things was a bad idea, but that doesn’t mean you caused it to teach them a lesson.
The wonder is not that bad things happen, it’s that anything good happens at all. The amount of beauty and good left in this world that we’ve done our best to break and keep breaking is evidence that God is at work, that God is sustaining. The fact that my body could handle something as bad as that without any help from a doctor is evidence that God works in bad situations, that the bodies he made adapt and function even when things aren’t ideal.
And the sense of his presence, wrapping around me during the worst of that time definitely shows that he weeps with the broken-hearted, and works in all things for our good. Note, working “in all things” doesn’t require him to have caused “all things” but shows his power and might that he can in fact work in “all things” good and bad, for the good of those who love him.